The adventure of applying for colleges has come to an end, and now your teen (and your family) are awaiting decisions from schools. Unless your student has already been admitted under an Early Decision program (in which case, congratulations), the coming weeks and months can feel like a particular kind of limbo. There are so many unknowns looming: which school or schools will your student be admitted to? What to do if they’re deferred, waitlisted or denied? How can you, as a parent, manage expectations and enjoy the holidays while wondering what the future holds?
Now is a great time to take a step back, take a deep breath, and simply take a moment to appreciate all the hard work your student put into their application process. Applying to college is a time-consuming and often emotionally vulnerable process. Completing multiple applications to colleges while balancing schoolwork, extracurriculars, and everything else is a massive accomplishment in and of itself. Regardless of the outcome, your student should feel proud of reaching this milestone; show them that you’re proud of them in whatever way works for you, whether that’s with a special dinner, a family outing, or a cozy trip to their favorite coffee shop. After you’ve taken a moment to celebrate, getting into the logistics of next steps will feel much more doable!
If your student applied under one or more early options (such as Early Action or Restrictive Early Action), you may be hearing a variety of responses from those schools. If your teen was admitted under either EA or REA, that’s great! You can enjoy the feeling of knowing that they have a great option while you wait to hear from their Regular Decision schools (just make sure you make a decision and submit an enrollment deposit by the deadline).
If your student was deferred from their ED or EA schools, that means the college’s admissions committee has chosen to move their application to the regular decision applicant pool, which ultimately means–you guessed it–more waiting. If they were waitlisted, you will also need to wait to see if they’re offered a spot. In the meantime, your student can contact the college if they choose and express their continued interest in attending with a letter of continued interest. It’s important to note that not all colleges permit letters of continued interest; it’s best to contact the school’s admissions office and find out what information, if any, they’d like to receive from deferred or waitlisted students.
If your student has been deferred or denied from their ED school, they have the option to apply Early Decision II to another school on their list–many of the application deadlines for EDII are the same as Regular Decision deadlines. EDII is a great way to express demonstrated interest in a college while still submitting close to the new year.
If your student applied Regular Decision to some of their college choices, the reality is that all you can do is wait until decisions come out. There are college admissions forums and social media groups online that post and track college admissions; the temptation to look at these is strong, but don’t let them take over your life! What you see online won’t necessarily determine the outcome for your student. Similarly, don’t base expectations on what your teen’s friends or peers are hearing from schools. Their admissions story may or may not be like anyone else’s, and that’s okay!
Lean into the joy of the holiday season as a way to ease the anxiety of waiting. Your teen’s applications are in the hands of admissions officers, and there’s no point in second guessing the materials that your teen submitted. Focus on togetherness, relaxation, and fun rituals that allow you and your family to enjoy the present moment together. Chances are, this time next year they’ll have their first semester of college under their belt–what an exciting thing to look forward to!
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